The other day I asked this question on my Facebook wall:
“What does peace with food look like to you?”
For me, 8 years ago, this question wasn’t even up for contemplation, my body “felt” broken, I could not trust that food knew what to do once it was “in there”, and any invitation to eat or drink out felt like a mine field. Will it make me fat, give me a headache, how many carbs are there, can I log it, can I work it off tomorrow…?
Like many other women I work with, my days were hijacked by thoughts about food, planned actions around food, and fear, worry and dread. There were self-created bright moments: a new seed (hello chia!), a new approach (cycle this macro), a new diet buddy (hey, Annie!), and then – a new month of autoimmune protocols, supplements, tests…and retests…
Internally I knew intuitively that it shouldn’t be that hard. I felt that my body should organically “know” what to do, how to manage energy in and energy out. The fact that I didn’t live that made me feel more broken. I saw people who “trusted” and enjoyed being in their bodies. Not me and I had no idea how to get there. I knew I was “managing” what should manage itself. And knowing what I know now, it’s not a surprise that it wasn’t working.
Today, peace with food is possible. Through many twists and turns, and lots of unexpected paths, I am here, in that place I glimpsed was possible. I feel excited to enjoy new foods, I love creating new recipes with Diana for Art of Real Food. I don’t have a voice in the head that counts, measures and prepares my plates. I don’t balance food and exercise on purpose, I do not feel obliged to try new diets and trends in hope that they work. I am true to how much is really enough, I don’t use food to reward or punish. I am grateful for each bite, taking in nourishment, trusting I am whole and well and that I don’t need to constantly worry that food will make me feel worse or feed hopes that it will make me feel better. It’s all of this. It’s also having energy to live life, create work that helps people, and being available to my relationship and family.
What did I do? Can you do it too? I believe so! I think the potential for healing lying dormant in my nervous system and psyche and the drive towards wholeness are not mine, or yours to own or have. They are universal, archetypal, and while they will manifest differently for each of us – we share them as a part of our common humanity. This level of well-being is our personal potential and highest collective possibility.
What I did was simple, but not easy. It required surrendering myself, consciously, to a long process of restoring a level of nervous system regulation that could support a body that knows how and what to eat, and how and when to move. Working with autonomics is not something you just do on your own – through my training to be a skilled trauma practitioner I had hundreds and hundreds of sessions, deep theoretical understanding, and lots of support from peers, teachers and supervisors.
I have done my best, over the last 4 years to make the practices of nervous system regulation, cranial nerve integration and mindful awareness available to everyone in my Peace with Food programs. It’s been very much the work of taking my own experience and my professional understanding and putting them together to apply in individual and group work. This work is still evolving and continues to evolve – and each step I take with a new client or a new group makes it richer and clearer.
On this path, I’ve been asked to teach this work outside personal sessions, group coaching and retreats and I also felt it was time to make it available and sharable with a larger circle. So, here is my invitation for you. In the link you’ll see my online workshop coming up next week! Take 90 minutes for a new way to look at food, experience food and relate to food! Find the relief behind understanding your food behaviors, and join others who are at peace with food and loving it! I hope that you experience the freedom that I did, and may this be the first step towards it.
Click here to save your seat. Use coupon code THE4TH to get 30% off through the end of July 4th weekend!